i'll stand...

david is having poker night tonight. the only stuff not packed is the stuff he is using to cook. and the boxes are piled around (but they are boys and won't care, right?). i LOVE that he cooks. i LOVE even more that he has worship music playing on pandora. and i love keith and kristyn getty. they are wonderful people. just heard david singing along to them... "till He returns, or calls me home, here in the power of Christ I'll stand". so true. i stand in HIM!

guilty... as charged!

back at the water...

"mommy, watch"!

love that smile!

trying to get into the other water!

the big light bright!!

so serious!

building blocks. it was fun to watch him try to get them together!

"jamey!!!"

another favorite... opening and shutting a door! (check out his shirt from nepal!! it says "yak yak yak"... thanks auntie rene!)

more water time!

oh wow!

his favorite thing... pushing the button OVER AND OVER!

on the ship!!

just like daddy... a good navigator!

a bright future career?? gosh i love that boy!

we went to the children's museum yesterday (as nora put it later, it is also a mommy's and daddy's museum..). we had a few hours before we had to get nora from school, and if i came home, there would have been too much to do. plus, since i left my kids with grammie and grandpa for a week, i felt bad not hanging out with him! we had a blast. a quick stop at whole foods for a few provisions, and then 45 minutes at the museum (it was only a 90 min roundtrip drive!).

it's been a stressful week. and i was STRESSED! lots of little things, some big things, and getting ready to MOVE to a tropical isle! ya know... i didn't always handle it well, and KNEW that my worry wasn't okay. (and i got to hold a baby in the middle of the week... that was a great stress relief!) i wanted to be as organized as i could be. and now i am thankful for that organization. there will be a few boxes of chaos- random papers and things, but mostly, it's fairly organized. i have my ohio stuff all packed up and the movers are doing their job.

i felt guilty for being stressed. and not "being there" for my kids. guilty for sending them away (although i KNEW that they would have a blast with grammie and grandpa and that would be way more fun than moving! and everyone would win, because we are moving far away, and this is a SPECIAL time!). but that added to my stress.

and i looked at this post and felt guilty that it's only about james. but seriously, how many posts (20 months worth) does nora have without jamey? and then guilty about that. guilty that i am sitting, blogging, while someone packs up my life. guilty that i am a little excited that i get a week without my kids, and my hubs and i can enjoy newport. guilty that i left hubs and the kids the other afternoon to walk with a friend, trying to help her go into labor, and work out! (she didn't...)

and guilty for all the guilt! how ridiculous is that? so i am done with the guilt. my kids are safe and having a BALL! i can hear it in their voices, and could see before they left how excited they were to be at grammie's! (nora got up to watch some of the wedding this morning, and it's reported that after "the kiss", nora said, "and they lived happily ever after". umm, maybe less disney in our lives??) it's good for all involved! i am over my guilt, and even stress now! it's easy day for awhile! and none of that was right...

in spite of my attitude, God was good (isn't He always). i got a call from a friend yesterday, offering to help in any way... bring us meals, paper plates, etc. (although, i am excited to get to eat out in newport!!) such a blessing! got to catch up with a few good friends on my drive to and from ikea (to get replacement furniture for some stuff i sold on craigslist!), lost and then found my credit card in ikea (thanks to the person who turned it in!!)...

i took nora to school yesterday morning, and started tearing up. i thought i was okay, and came back to pick her up. i watched her friends literally dogpile her and hug her. i watched her teacher hug her and kiss her on the cheek. and i started bawling. which made a few other moms cry. (okay, confession... i am tearing up just writing this) and then realized i am SO THANKFUL for this school. these friends. the fact that we will see some of them again! i would probably have cried on nora's last day of preschool regardless... my baby is growing up! it made it harder that we are leaving. she, however, just smiled and waved! (and keeps asking for a few of them to be at her birthday! sad...)

thanks for reading this far (for those of you who stuck with me!). thanks for letting me journal and pour out my heart. i told david last night, again through tears, that i am sad we are "choosing" to be apart for the next few months. but we have prayed about it and feel it is best (and excited to be in ohio for the summer). sad to be leaving again, but LOVE that this is my life. i was just chatting with one of the movers about my love for travel and adventure. it fits perfectly with my navy wife job! i am excited for the next chapter. just sad about closing this one.

we are looking at some houses online, and hope to set up a few appointments for when david gets there! start booking your plane tickets!!!

a birthday...

i turned 30 last week, in case you missed it! and i am so wonderfully blessed. a few weeks ago, a friend threw a WONDERFUL party! it was so nice to visit with my friends, celebrate ME!, and have a chance to see everyone before i left. i didn't realize how close we were to the end! then, my mom came to visit. we had such a fun week (despite my awful crankiness...)! she's been to visit around several of my last birthdays! then, another friend and her hubby and me and mine over for fondue and games. we LOVE, LOVE, LOVE those times! (and are so thankful they are making the big move with us!)

i was showered with gifts... fun ones, practical ones, ones i had been crushing on. i have been wanting (and slowly collecting) new pots and pans. that is one thing i regret not registering for. the ones i have have handles falling off and some are hand me downs from others! (so, of course i handed them down!!) i (think i ) have a "full" collection now! (by full, i mean, the fewest possible pots i can get away with!! we had friends over a few weeks ago, and i have been counting the pots we use...) i am quite excited by this!

i also got some green... i want to make a few updates to our stuff, and between birthday money and stuff i have been selling on cl, i think i should be good...

i think my second favorite thing was the card david wrote me. i have been telling him for years how much a card means to me. (by card, i also mean ANYTHING written on ANYTHING... doesn't have to be hallmark!) he wrote me the sweetest card and woke me with a kiss to give it to me on the big day! it was wonderful and had me smiling all weekend!

but then... i got another card. and i cried. hard. my family has this competition. it's whose card makes the person cry the hardest. byss... you won this one! you got me. it was so beautiful. wonderfully written and so much fun to read! and, there was a cd. byssa has been doing a radio show for her college this year which has been SO. MUCH. FUN. to listen to! in the beginning, she said i had influenced her listening to country music. this year, SHE has been my inspiration... since my songs were usually limited to what veggie tales sang! it has been fun to listen to new music again!

there were so many nice cards, fb messages and phone calls... thanks to all of you who made my weekend SO. SPECIAL!!

happy easter!! and hold on to your horses!

eating breakfast...

walking with their coco...

love.

sweet girl in her ray-bans!

fun time with auntie coco

just being silly!

shakes for lunch!

i think it's the first time we are in a bar together!

out with stef's friends!!! what a great group!

reading!!

wearing his daddy's cover...

pushing her "kiddos" on the swing

i love this man!

and my darling mother!!!

nothing beats that smile!!!

mom-mom and her babies!

and again... breakfast!

snuggling nora, getting ready to leave!

playing the recorder at grammie's

he said, "jamey chose (close) eyes"... and tried to eat his snack with his eyes closed!

my big boy at the park!

all the kids getting ready for the easter egg hunt! sadly, the rain did not hold off...

but that didn't stop the kids!

i love how excited they all were!!

all the kids.... i am so thankful for our friends!

and for the moms!!!

love these girls!

pretending to be woody!

first real easter baskets!

showing them off...

m&m's...

more hunting for eggs...

she manages to find princess dresses wherever we go!

very intent on his mission...

new friends... hopefully they get another chance to play when the kids are at grammie's for a week while we move out!

still LOVE that smile!!

nora loved auntie sarah's boyfriend... and all of auntie sarah's college friends. thankfully, i think they loved her right back!

family photo...

silly hat day at school... and since mom forgot to bring the easter hat to easter... why not wear it?

it was also teddy bear day... nora signing in to school...

nora and her AWESOME teacher!

jamey and his gluten free "donut"-muffin from this cool little gluten free bakery we found! i am loving mornings with just him!

we went to a playdate at a friend's house. it was THE. COOLEST. HOUSE.! and jamey loved this HUGE mirror! so much fun to hang out and visit....

and walk across the street to the park. i might have been a bit ambitious in shorts and flippys, but hey...

just chilling... nora went to a friends', and didn't get home until dinner time. (and she was WIPED out! fell asleep, woke her up, brought her to the table, where she fell asleep again, and BONKED her nose!)

what my kitchen counter looks like... all the food to get rid of this week. i think we'll do pretty well...

reading at easter...

so, i am feeling pretty well organized. tomorrow, i will pack. (this might involve buying another suitcase first. why do i feel like we let someone borrow one, and know i can't remember who??) it's really happening... the packers come on friday. phew... i feel like i have been saying that a lot recently! but, i am feeling less anxious!

AND... i ran a sub-10 minute mile today! can't tell you the last time i did that!! david came home in the middle of the day, and i got to sneak out for a run. i have been doing that a lot more recently, and it's been fun! yes, run and fun in the same sentence!

alright, i have spent WAY TO MUCH time looking at houses in hawaii tonight, so it's off to bed for me! i can hear the foghorn blowing... it's been crazy foggy here recently. and, i think i can hear daddy and nora up... might be time to change the sheets! nora has been asking for drinks, and PROMISING that she will get up to go to the bathroom. it still doesn't always happen....